<p style="font-family: verdana,sans-serif;"><font size="2"><span style="font-size: 10pt;"><b>Everyone's Ex-Girlfriend</b><b> </b><br></span></font></p>
<p style="font-family: verdana,sans-serif;"><font size="2"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">Everyone's ex-girlfriend keeps
showing up.<br>She surfaces when I've only just
relaxed,<br>when I let things be<br>soft. I recognize her because I've
been her so well.</span><br><i><span style="font-size: 10pt;">You have nothing to worry about</span></i><span style="font-size: 10pt;">,<br>he says. <i>Why would I want someone</i></span><br><i><span style="font-size: 10pt;">who tried so hard to hurt me</span></i><span style="font-size: 10pt;">?<br>
And then the distracted look. </span></font></p>
<p style="font-family: verdana,sans-serif;"><font size="2"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">She used to scream at everyone,<br>was the first to walk out.<br>Everyone's ex-girlfriend<br>had sex with their good friends</span><br>
<i><span style="font-size: 10pt;">during a phase</span></i><span style="font-size: 10pt;">. <br></span></font></p>
<p style="font-family: verdana,sans-serif;"><font size="2"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">Everyone's ex-girlfriend is always<br>meeting everyone late at night.<br>Busy girl. He says<br></span><i>Maybe I'll stop by after</i><br>
<span style="font-size: 10pt;">and then calls from home.<br>I say <i>Did you have a good time</i><br>and he says <i>We've really grown apart.</i><br>But I can picture the tall bar
stools. <br></span></font></p>
<p style="font-family: verdana,sans-serif;"><font size="2"><i><span style="font-size: 10pt;">You look great,</span></i><span style="font-size: 10pt;"> they
might<br>say to each other, shiny eyes. <i>You always were</i></span><br><i><span style="font-size: 10pt;">like that. Some things never change</span></i><span style="font-size: 10pt;">.<br>It's snowing! The snow is in their
hair. <br></span></font></p>
<p style="font-family: verdana,sans-serif;"><font size="2"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">When he says<i> It was wild to see someone</i></span><br><i><span style="font-size: 10pt;">after so long</span></i><span style="font-size: 10pt;">, I
hear <i>Our skin was so cold</i>. <br></span></font></p>
<p style="font-family: verdana,sans-serif;"><font size="2"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">Everyone says</span><br><i><span style="font-size: 10pt;">I don't know who I am right now.<br>I feel like I haven't felt anything in a long time.<span> </span></span></i></font></p>
<p style="font-family: verdana,sans-serif;"><font size="2"><i><span style="font-size: 10pt;">Alright</span></i><span style="font-size: 10pt;">, he says to her,</span><br><i><span style="font-size: 10pt;">You're giving me a hard-on</span></i><span style="font-size: 10pt;">.</span><br>
<i><span style="font-size: 10pt;">Really,</span></i><span style="font-size: 10pt;"> she murmurs. She
is so mean.<br>Her drink splashes around in her
glass.</span><br><i><span style="font-size: 10pt;">Touch it</span></i><span style="font-size: 10pt;">, he says.</span><span style="font-size: 10pt;"></span></font></p>
<font size="2"><br style="font-family: verdana,sans-serif;"></font>
<p style="font-family: verdana,sans-serif;"><font size="2"><span style="font-size: 10pt;"><b>My
Life on a Conveyor Belt</b><b> </b><br></span></font></p>
<p style="font-family: verdana,sans-serif;"><font size="2"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">Mostly,
my lover lies there,<br>his
soft penis against his thigh.<br>He
is sleeping.<span> </span>I watch him go by.<br>Then
– the commandments.<br>And
my body parts,<br>breasts
falling to the side<br>snagging
on the rubber,<br>hair
flowing from a small white plate<br>covered
with tildes.<span></span><br>The
clear plastic bowl on top.<span></span><br>The
hostess seats people all around me.<br>Desire
shimmers by like the pavement<br>in
sunshine.<span> </span>My family is not on the belt,<br>they
are in me.<br>The
belt motors:<br>a
beautiful soap dish,<br>a
small machine.<span></span><br>Some
soup, or at least a soupy substance.<br>Piles
of sugar.<span></span><br>Plus
one man.<br>My
heart pounds.<span> </span>Is it the sugar?<br>Fear
like an animal crouching<br>at
the night opening of a tent.<span> </span>Dark<br>at
first, and then the eyes adjust.</span></font></p>
<font size="2"><br style="font-family: verdana,sans-serif;" clear="all"></font>
<p style="font-family: verdana,sans-serif;"><font size="2"><span style="font-size: 11pt;"><b>Sarah Heller </b>received her BA from Bard College
and her MFA in poetry from NYU. She currently works as the Executive Director
of the Authors League Fund and teaches at Rutgers University.
She has work published or forthcoming in <i>Painted
Bride Quarterly, Pembroke Magazine, NextBook The Temple/El Templo, Thin Air, </i>and
<i>Hayloft</i>, and she is on the board of
directors of Nightboat Books. She has received fellowships or awards from
the MacDowell Colony, the Drisha Institute, Virginia Council for the Creative
Arts, Vermont Studio Center,
and the Soul Mountain Retreat. She was the recipient of the Nadya
Aisenberg Fellowship at the MacDowell Colony for 2005-2006.</span></font></p><br clear="all"><br>-- <br>RealPoetik<br><a href="http://realpoetik.blogspot.com">realpoetik.blogspot.com</a>